Ron White — Cost of Sunglasses

Ron isn’t sure how a pair of sunglasses can cost more than a color television. On a recent trip to the Sunglass Hut to pick up a pair of new sunglasses, he encounters a salesperson who tries to convince him that the elimination of UV rays makes the glasses worth their price tag. Ron, not so politely, disagrees.

Ron White — The Death Penalty

Ron White describes how his state is different than California and one of those ways is through the use of the death penalty. In other states, they may be trying to cut back on the use of the death penalty for heinous crimes, but Texas appears to be trying to put in an express lane. The death penalty, while controversial, is often used by states as a credible threat and a deterrence mechanism in order to reduce future crime.

Ron White — Best Response

Ron White, in They Call Me Tater Salad, discusses an interaction with a fan who wanted him to know that it’s illegal to shoot someone in the back regardless of what crime they’ve committed against you. Ron quickly points out that you could just shoot them in the leg in order to get them to turn around, which means that the optimal strategy is to never turn around.

Ron White — Coupons

Ron White describes how he tried to buy a beer using actual money, but by the time he got to the front of the line he finds out that the vendor requires him to pay for his beer with coupons. Ron then has to go stand in another line in order to get coupons (for cash) so that he can then trade coupons for a beer.

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